Guest blog: Embryo Adoption

This is my first guest blogger, in a series (I hope), of various topics. Myself, and my guest bloggers, hope to inspire others by sharing these stories. If you have something to share, please email me @ Baby4Lisa(at)gmail(dot)com. Please comment with any questions for the guest blogger or myself.

One thing I’ve learned is that there are many different paths to parenthood. Our own personal journey led my husband and I toward embryo adoption.
For us, adoption was always a backup plan. Years ago – before seven IUI’s, two IVFs and a small fortune in meds/procedures – we explored our thoughts and resolved that if we can’t get pregnant, we will adopt.
We felt that our second round of IVF might be our last hope of having our own biological child. We started with two fresh cycles, but both failed. So our last FET with two leftover embryos from the previous cycles truly seemed like our absolute last chance. It resulted in a pregnancy, but then sadly a miscarriage after nine weeks.
According to our original plan, our next step was the adoption agency. We had already selected an agency about a year ago, and had learned as much as we could about the adoption process.
But during this very sad time (I was miscarrying), my acupuncture doctor suggested embryo adoption. I had heard of that option before, but as with other possible options, I had never really considered it.
While lots of my friends in my support group were discussing donor eggs, I really was not drawn to that. And surrogacy never came to my mind either, maybe because of the enormous expense. We agreed that we are not going to have a child and be completely broke.
But somehow embryo adoption sounded more and more interesting to us as we looked into it. If you know anything about regular adoption, then you know that it can be very expensive, with lots of legal requirements.
Embryo adoption -as presented to us- seemed like a much easier route. Basically, couples that have had IVF treatments often have left over embryos that are kept preserved in cold storage. If they conceive without using all of their stored embryos, they can choose to donate their leftovers for adoption.
For people in our situation, this process bypasses many of the legal hurdles of full adoption. And often- not always- there is only the cost of the frozen embryo transfer and legal fees. Altogether, it can be up to ten times less expensive than adoption!
Not all IFV clinics have an embryo adoption program, but we were lucky enough to be referred by my acupuncture doctor to one that does. While some embryo adoption programs can be a lot more complicated than others, on the whole it’s less complicated than the full adoption process.
I had accepted that my being pregnant was not as important as having a child of our own no matter how we got there. Still, I find the prospect of being pregnant and carrying our adopted child to be a major plus of embryo adoption. Of course I know that there is no guarantee of success, but as ever, there is always hope.
During these long and sad years hoping for the kid I always was wondering why our wait is so long. Now I can tell that I was waiting for my sweet little boy. He fits so perfectly into our family. We are so happy and blessed!
If anyone has any questions I would gladly answer.
Babydust to all!

3 thoughts on “Guest blog: Embryo Adoption

  1. Thank you so much for this blog today. Talk about perfect timing. I was just in the process yesterday of getting information from my clinic on embryo adoption. Financially I was SO surprised how affordable it was.

  2. Maybe do a part 2, what the process was like for you and your husband, thoughts and feelings you went through and how it is to have a child now. I enjoyed the post but felt it ended abrutly…like there was so much more to tell!

  3. Lisa, thanks for posting it. I have been away from computer for couple of weeks and haven’t even chance to check the posting out!

    Toni, I wish you best of luck! If you need any information then you are welcome to contact me! It was total coincidence that our journey took us to embryo adoption. And I am so happy!

    Christel, I agree with you… I did not write about the process and feelings. I just wanted to advocate the embryo adoption and let people know about it! During the pregnancy I sometimes wondered our own biological children, but after he was born I forgot his origin. He is so ours and we love him so much.

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