A tough day…and losing my job

Friday started out kind of rough. I woke up in a lot of pain, coming from my back/bum again. This time, it’s my left SI joint (near the tailbone) that hurts. It had been my right SI joint bothering me since the beginning of March. The right side feels mostly better. Both sides of my hips are sore, which is fairly new. I had done some activity Wednesday and Thursday to test how I would feel, prior to my Orthopedic specialist follow up Friday afternoon. I wanted to know if I could handle going back to work, after being off and resting for 3 weeks.

Before I went to my appointment, I stopped and picked up a few groceries. I popped the trunk to place them inside. Normally, there’s an automatic lift when I open it, but apparently it’s not working correctly. I pushed it up myself – and it seemed secure and like it was going to stay up – but nope. Suddenly it fell down, and the edge cracked me right on the bridge of my nose! Ouch! It hurt like a mofo!! I saw stars, and my eyes began watering profusely. By the time I got in the car, I realized I was bleeding all over the place. There was a small cut on my nose, and the area was already beginning to bruise.

Between my tears, I had to laugh. I often have weirdo accidents! My last one (months ago) was gouging my eye with my own tweezers, and I ended up in Urgent Care with a bad corneal abrasion. Plus, being pregnant and looking like I was in a fist fight = not good. But funny! It’s embarrassing though, and I hope I don’t have to see anyone for a few days. I’m glad it’s the weekend, and I have nowhere to go. πŸ˜‰

Not sure if you can see the extent of it in this pic. The bruising goes down the bridge of my nose and to the sides, even under my eyes a bit. Some of those darker shadows are just from the lighting. I look kind of evil in this pic. LOL.


Anyway, I went to my appointment, already feeling poorly – and it was not good news. The Orthopedic specialist believes I am unable to return to work – at all (at least while pregnant). I truly didn’t expect to hear that, even though I know it was a possibility. He was glad I tested myself with some activity over the past couple days. It gave him a better idea of what I could handle (which is not much). Just a slight touch to my left SI joint brought on tears. He said he doesn’t want to do another MRI because we already know it’s the same thing I had in my right SI joint. The only thing that will help is rest.

He explained the further along I get (and the larger I get) there will be more pressure and discomfort added to my pelvis. Any type of strenuous activity will only irritate the area further. He also said we need to treat my condition like “fine china”, since I am pregnant (and high risk). Any extra stress (like pain) could be detrimental to myself and my baby. Once he said that, it put aside any doubts I had about going back to work. Not that I had a choice, but it made me realize he was right.

Even so, I was very upset about realizing I would no longer have a job. My career that I love so much. It’s a huge part of my life. I love what I do, I enjoy the patients, and I adore my boss and coworkers. I called my boss to update her, and she asked for my letter of resignation. After speaking with some friends, I decided I had better talk to Human Resources before doing anything. I’ll give them a call on Monday. It doesn’t seem fair to lose my job over a medical problem. I’m not going to stress or fight about it, but it’s best to see what my options are (if anything).

Even if they could hold my position, I only have about 1-2 weeks of Short-Term Disability pay left and 9 weeks of FMLA. That wouldn’t cover what I need. Plus, in a few months, I’d be taking maternity leave. I wouldn’t be back until November maybe? And that’s assuming my back is better right away, which I’ve heard doesn’t always happen right away after giving birth.

My boss said she needs to post my position immediately, so they can hire someone else. I definitely understand that, but it was kind of heart breaking. I got off the phone with her and sat there bawling. The finality of closing that chapter in my life hit me very hard. Plus hormones and everything. I’m sure I can re-apply in the future, but there are no guarantees. I do have a great work history there, and my boss would definitely give me a glowing recommendation.

We will work it out somehow. Andy’s new job is great, and we have his insurance now. Maybe this has happened for a reason. I feel more at peace about it today. I’m looking forward to so many wonderful things to come. I will have time to prepare for my baby’s arrival, and spend all the time I want with him when he gets here. There are too many positives to focus on the negatives. My nose still hurts like a mofo though. LOL. πŸ˜‰

27 thoughts on “A tough day…and losing my job

  1. It breaks my heart to see you have to leave your job, hopefully only temp. Although, my advice if they decide to let you go, let them take the action. You can at least collect unemployment until further notice. You’ll still have something coming in. I know you like your boss, but for her to tell you to turn in a resignation is not professional. You’ve done nothing wrong. Besides you’ll win this should they fire you for a medical condition you can’t prevent. I’m thinking of you suguar.

  2. Ouch! What a rough series of events. I also agree with Cassidy — this is not voluntary on your part, and if you can collect a bit of unemployment, I’m sure the money will be needed and well used. Hoping you get a series of great events soon to balance this out!

  3. I’m sorry to hear all this bad news, and your poor nose! Hoping things get a little happier in the coming weeks, and that you get to appreciate and enjoy being at home with you little one. Being a SAHM is a challenge in itself, but it has its benefits!

  4. Ouch! I like that pic of you – you look like a badass. lol. πŸ™‚
    So sorry to hear of the doc recommendations and sad conversation with your boss. I’m not sure why she’s asking for your letter of resignation… is it because you said you can’t work the rest of the pregnancy and your leave will run out pretty soon? I would think there would be some kind of additional disability coverage for situations like this. It’s true you can’t get unemployment if you resign.
    I’m glad you’re feeling more at peace about it today, anyway, and that’s awesome that Andy has a great job to support you guys for now.

    • haha!! I do look pretty tough now! πŸ˜‰
      Yes, that seems to be why she asked for it. It does seem unusual. I will try to find out what I can. Thank you!

  5. Well hun, look on the bright side, at least you will have much more time bonding with baby and really getting in touch with him emotionally, even though he’s still ib your tummy!! Plus you also won’t be so much accident prone! Lol just kidding. Hope you’re feeling much better sweety πŸ™‚ much love

  6. I’m sorry about your nose and more importantly, your job situation. I hope you can figure things out quickly. In the meantime, stay positive and focus in growing that that little boy of yours πŸ™‚ Hugs!

  7. WHAT?!?! Why should you have to resign? DON’T RESIGN! Can you go on long-term disability then? I am outraged for you. (Not that being a SAHM would be bad, I would love that, but it should be your choice). And you shouldn’t have to go back instantly after Spot is born, you’ll need several months with him. November is really close, why can’t they wait? Why can’t they hire someone on a year’s contract to replace you? That’s how we roll here were everyone has a year of mat leave, and usually takes it. My own boss had pg complications and was off from ~16 weeks until one year after she had the babies (so, like over a year and a half!) – no one batted an eye. GL! Will be thinking of you. And sorry about the nose, that sucks.

  8. Definitely talk to HR to see if you’ve purchased long-term disability (or if the company is nice enough to have a policy for you). Many, many people use this type of insurance for cancer treatments or complicated surgery. If you resign due to a disability, you won’t be able to qualify for unemployment. If they fire you for anything other than cause, then you CAN qualify for unemployment (but generally, you have to actively be searching for a new job). And by making them lay you off, you might be able to get a severance package that you don’t get if you resign. Think real carefully before you resign.

  9. Oh Lisa, your poor nose! Ouch, it looks sore – I hope it heals quickly. Also, I was sorry to read the news about your job. I know that many people don’t enjoy working but, when you love a job, it becomes such a big part of your life. It defines part of who you are and can be a such a source of joy. I agree with the previous comments, it seems very harsh that you should be asked to resign from your job because your pregnancy means that you are unable to work. Maybe your boss didn’t really think it through and asking you to resign was just her first reaction. Whatever the case, I hope it works out well.

    • That’s true, I wonder if my boss wasn’t thinking. Hopefully today I’ll get more answers/options when I call the human resources department.
      And thank you, it is a bit tough when you do enjoy working. I’m already feeling a lot more positive about it though. πŸ™‚ Thank you!

  10. Oh man…so sorry to hear about the job. I agree calling Human Resources on Monday is a good idea. Maybe you are right…this has happened for a reason at this time. Maybe you are meant to take more time off to spend with your LO. Take care, rest up. Boo to the nose injury! That is exactly the type of thing that would happen to me!

  11. I can’t believe the trunk fell on you!! You poor girl….just added insult to injury for your day.

    But bigger issues, I am so sorry about your job. I really don’t know what the right answer is. You can call HR, but I don’t know what they will tell you. Possibly disability? Maybe, if it’s possible, you can just take the time to get healthy and take care of your baby for a bit and then reapply for your old job or another in the field. Are you a nurse? If so, you are highly employable and could probably get another job once your back situation is figured out.

    That being said, it sucks and it’s unfair and I’m not sure it’s legal. So sorry this happened to you 😦

    • Yes, I am a nurse, so hopefully it will be a little less difficult to find employment when I decide to re-join the workforce. Unfortunately, I know a lot of unemployed nurses, so that’s a scary thought. Even so, I’m feeling more positive and looking forward to staying home with my little guy πŸ˜€
      And thank you, it sure did add insult to injury! It was kinda funny though, LOL. πŸ™‚

  12. Pingback: Week 23 Update | The Pursuit of Pregnancy

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