I’m back! Updates and plans

FINALLY our computer has been repaired! We had viruses on our PC and my laptop! Everything is running smoothly and quickly now, and I can’t wait to catch up with all of you!

I started my new job/new clinic at Children’s Hospital this past week. I have been working there for the last 2 years, and I thought I wanted to leave. It was becoming too difficult to work with other people’s children – as well as see the poor kiddos sick and in pain. The last clinic I was working in exposed me to a lot of sad situations. My new clinic is not bad at all! I think it’s the perfect fit for me. I’m glad I didn’t leave because I would miss working with kids. Although, I still get those pangs and feelings of longing. I still have my home health care jobs, but probably won’t be working many hours there anymore. The gas money to drive to clients’ houses is getting ridiculous!

I have some plans in regard to TTC, my DX, and surrogacy:

  • We will be “sort of trying”, but not really. We’re going to BD around my fertile days (and other days for fun) – although try not plan it much. NO OPKS, NO temping, NO testing, etc. I don’t expect anything to happen, but I just cannot completely stop. It’s not like we’re going to use BC or protection. There’s probably a very minute chance of a miracle happening, but I doubt it. After what Dr. Sher said, I no longer have hope 😦
  • I plan on getting a Lap done in a few months, as Dr. Scheiber (my regular RE) recommended. It’s not necessarily for fertility purposes. I’ve noticed more pain with my AFs and around ovulation time. Pretty bad pain. My AFs have gotten heavier as well. I would like to see if anything’s going on and get some relief.
  • We are going to go see Dr. Kwak-Kim in a few months, as well, for a 2nd opinion. I don’t know what we’ll do with that information or what steps we will even WANT to take, after all we’ve been through. I don’t want to get my hopes up, only to spend more money and have more heartache and loss.
  • I’m still saving for a surrogate! It’s going to take a long time to reach that goal. I still think it’s probably our best bet. At this point, I don’t know if we can find a friend to do it for us. We’ll be looking elsewhere and hoping that someone will do it for a little less than the thousands of dollars I’m seeing everyone asking for. I know it’s a HUGE thing, and the woman should be compensated and taken care of for doing it….It just would be wonderful if it wasn’t so much.

9 thoughts on “I’m back! Updates and plans

  1. I know it seems like there is no hope, but where there’s love, there’s hope. Everyone’s situation is sooo different, but here’s one close to my heart that might be a ray of hope for you: my parents tried for a baby for 7 long years. They had miscarriage after miscarriage and a full term stillborn. My parents had pretty much stopped trying, were looking for other ways to build their family, and then…I was conceived, out of the blue. And I made it. Where there’s love, there’s hope. My mom reminds me of this all the time, that if they had truly stopped trying, if they had really given up completely, I wouldn’t be here today, and as a product of that hope, I am sincerely thankful they didn’t lose sight of their dream. There is a baby out there for you, Lisa, I truly believe that. Wishing you lots of peace and comfort during this challenging time. Hugs!

  2. Welcome back 🙂 I’m glad you are enjoying your new position – hopefully it will be the perfect fit for you. It seems like you are in a good place right now. I’m still praying that you’ll get your miracle very soon!

  3. i hope another friend finds it in their heart to offer you the gift of surrogacy without wanting money. it breaks my heart that you cant find anyone to do this for you! if my situation were different and I lived in the US and not Australia, id be knocking on your door!
    i am praying for a miracle for you, however the means!!

  4. I don’t know whether to say don’t give up hope, ever, or that it’s good and forward-looking to let go, close that page (not the book… ). Maybe both?

    I always felt better having a plan, even if the plan was to do nothing for a while since the whole baby making thing is so, so tiring. Enjoy your new clinic, your hubby and having fun!

  5. Glad you finally got the computer fixed! Sounds like you’ve had some time now to digest this all and figure out where to go, though I wish the news were more optimistic.

    A good friend of mine who blogs at blessingandwonder.wordpress.com used to see Dr. Kawk-Kim. They were not ultimately successful with IF treatment, but they just adopted a gorgeous baby boy. She has some info about the dr and her clinic on there and if you want, I will see if she’d be interested in exchanging emails with you about her immunology treatment and experience at that clinic.

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