11

Just a few things

Sorry I haven’t been around much. My new job is taking up a lot of my time. It’s going well though. This past week, I’ve been really sick with the flu, as well. I promise to catch up with you all as soon as I can. I’m thinking of you all!!

I should be gearing up to ovulate this weekend! Like I said in my last post, we are sort of trying. I actually haven’t even thought of it much, between being sick and working. I still feel some fight left in me, so I might as well use it while I can.

I decided to schedule my Lap surgery – at least to rule things out and have peace of mind (or who knows, they may find something!). I’m playing phone tag with the scheduler at the moment. I’m also scheduling my 2nd opinon with Dr. Kwak-Kim (another autoimmune specialist). I requested my lab results from Dr. Sher to be sent to Dr. Kwak-Kim, then they will call me to schedule.

So I like having some possibilities to look forward to, as we still save for a surrogate or adoption. Feels good to have some plans in place. Even if we find no new information, at least I know I have exhausted all my resources and done everything I could.

21

I’m going to be more positive and that’s that.

AF finally arrived a few days late, and I’m now on CD 3. We’ve decided on a whim, to use my last refill of Clomid this cycle. I keep wondering…why have we gotten pregnant more times this year than any other time? We just need one to stick. It could happen. Maybe.

Yes, the odds are against us. But haven’t we all read stories where women were told they would never conceive or carry a baby to term – and lo and behold – they beat the odds! I want to be one of those stories.

If I have to go through hell and back, I will get my baby. I will do anything, whether that means to keep trying and miscarrying, surrogacy, adoption, or what have you. And if I can help inspire others because of, or in spite of all my struggles – then bring it on! I find great purpose in helping others. Maybe that is why I’m on this path, as hellish as it is.

I’m going to make infertility my bitch!!! lol

10

Testing early is bad!!

The subject says it all! LOL. I can’t believe I haven’t learned my lesson yet about testing early. You would think I would have by now, with all my terrible luck. I am going to do my best not to test until AF is late from now on – or not at all! I’m thinking that either I’m picking up on fertilization/the start of implantation – or I have terrible luck with evaps and such.

It’s hard to believe I will ever have a strong positive with good betas and a take home baby. We will keep “sorta trying” and keeping our fingers crossed. I can’t wait til my better insurance kicks in, so I can go get a 2nd opinion on my new DX. I am just curious what info I can find out. Other than that, I’ll keep putting money in our surrogacy savings account. Hopefully something good will pan out.

And AF is still not here! I’m 1 day late now, but have no desire to test anymore this cycle! It could just be a wacky cycle. Being off fertility drugs can cause wacky things.